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"The women who raised me were never shy, modest, paragons of virtue. They were saucy, bawdy, broads who cursed like sailors. When I was growing up they tended bar and waited tables and drove taxis and worked as nurses. They worked hard both inside and outside the home, with food being an absolutely central way of expressing love. They adored babies and were very open, and enthusiastic, about sex."

Your family represents the best of women. Thanks for sharing the lovely photos. Condolences for your loss.

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Thank you Comrade! 🥹

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"Your family represents the best of women." Well said, Yuri.

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💚

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A brilliant essay, Jenny. "The correct term for Hathaway’s analysis, I believe, is horseshit": 🤣 Loads to comment on here, but I'll just pick up on a couple. Someone called Lady Colin Campbell, a lady who has a YouTube programme and whom no man in his right mind would mess with, was complaining some time ago about the infantilisation of women on the London underground and elsewhere, full of stern adminitions to men, about "unwanted touching", "staring" etc. She said that in her day (she was quite a beautiful model) any man trying it on would be dealt with pretty swiftly and directly by the woman concerned. I've always preferred strong women myself, possibly because all the women in my family are what one might call "robust". A few years ago I was in a course about noteworthy novellas, one of which was The Stepford Wives. I said, and repeated, that I thought the whole premise was ridiculous. Why would anyone marry a beatiful, dynamic, strong woman, and then have her turned into a robot? The tutor made me shut up about it in the end and told me to suspend my disbelief. Rod Liddle, in an (unfortunately paywalled) article in The Spectator, has written about the MP Rosie Duffield, who has been railing for years against allowing men into women's spaces, said:

"This is what happens when you let them vote, these women-people. They start getting really arsey. Perhaps we should have let them throw themselves in front of horses and simply put it down to the time of the month, rather than caving in and letting them march towards the polling booths. What interests me however, is the apparent problem which left-wing men have with women – which may well stem from an inability to identify a woman in the first place. After all, if there is no essential difference between the two sexes then we may as well forget about feminism, because it cannot by definition exist."

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Thank you!! Your comment reminded me of something that (I think?) has been remarked upon about left vs right when it comes to women. For some reason, it's always the so-called conservative or right wing parties that elect women heads of state - Thatcher, Meloni, May. The left-progressives have not yet managed it, for all their harping on gender equality. Surely that tells you something?

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I'm entranced by the photo of your grandmother and her seven daughters. Everyone looks so genuinely happy. : )

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Oct 5·edited Oct 5Author

I know 🥹 Raucous laughter has always been a thing in my family. Nasty spats too! Lol

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Oct 4Liked by Jenny Holland

What a wonderful reverie on the sisterhood! I have 4 sisters who were not so bawdy or gutsy, but we had our moments growing up. Trans world has set me and my sisters on either side of an icy chasm, as they implied I should have "tried to stay" in an untenable marriage and pretended to be a lesbian like Neddy suggested when he explained his plans to enact "The Blanchard Protocol" and "become a woman" on a 2 year schedule that collapsed into just one. That was 1995. My sisters, in the proto-woke environs of university town, Madison, Wisconsin, would have scored a lot of points if Ute had donned this version of the emperor's new clothes. After all, Neddy and his therapist said I could take on lovers if that worked for me. After all, while I was out trysting, Neddy would be "playing Mom" with our young sons. One of the trans widows in my data of 61 (and growing) did that, to later be served with divorce papers by "Bridgett" the husband 5 years into the deception, accusing her of infidelity and demanding full custody of their 10 year old daughter. More about trans widows at Lime Soda Films, where the documentary, Behind the Looking Glass is free, and where filmmaker Vaishnavi Sundar is starting to release the individual trans widows' interviews.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Frffv2sB8zE

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Honestly, coming from a family of ball-busting women may have been the biggest gift of my life.

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Oct 5Liked by Jenny Holland

Reading this, I think of my midwestern silent generation Grandmother, who ruled the family with an iron fist & was not even remotely close to a shrinking violet, but who everyone not only respected - they worshipped the ground she walked on.

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Yup!

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Oct 4Liked by Jenny Holland

Back in the 1930's anthropologist and adventurer Gunnar Myrdal observed that America was a matriarchy. It still is.

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Oct 4Liked by Jenny Holland

It’s funny we’re supposed to pretend that the mesmerizing effect of female beauty doesn’t exist and actually there aren’t really women. Men can be women and take a look at those who have become-//. I’ll shut up . Good work Jenny! Believe me after 47 , it doesn’t get easier but if you’re still around, well you are. As my favorite Irish writer said , I can’t go on, I’ll go on!

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I know!

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Brilliant read. And so important. I also grew up "unburdened by the notion that to be female was to be weak and projected upon." Agreed --> more of this reality back in the conversation, please!

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Thank you!!

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Coming from a background of more passive aggressive females, I decided 30 years ago to become an Orthopaedic surgeon - a profession that is 93% male. When I heard myself referred to (behind my back) as Snarling Helltroll, I knew I’d made it. 🤣

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Jesus Christ respected women long ago. When a woman was about to be stoned for adultery, Jesus said, "Let him who is without sin cast the first stone" and the crowd dispersed. Galatians 3:28 says, "There is neither Jew nor Gentile, neither slave nor free, nor is there male or female, for you are all one in Christ Jesus." Genesis 1:27 says, "So God created mankind in his own image, in the image of God he created them; male and female he created them."

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Dear Jenny

Thankyou for your piece.

10 Who can find a virtuous woman? for her price is far above rubies.

11 The heart of her husband doth safely trust in her, so that he shall have no need of spoil.

12 She will do him good and not evil all the days of her life.

13 She seeketh wool, and flax, and worketh willingly with her hands.

14 She is like the merchants' ships; she bringeth her food from afar.

15 She riseth also while it is yet night, and giveth meat to her household, and a portion to her maidens.

16 She considereth a field, and buyeth it: with the fruit of her hands she planteth a vineyard.

17 She girdeth her loins with strength, and strengtheneth her arms.

18 She perceiveth that her merchandise is good: her candle goeth not out by night.

19 She layeth her hands to the spindle, and her hands hold the distaff.

20 She stretcheth out her hand to the poor; yea, she reacheth forth her hands to the needy.

21 She is not afraid of the snow for her household: for all her household are clothed with scarlet.

22 She maketh herself coverings of tapestry; her clothing is silk and purple.

23 Her husband is known in the gates, when he sitteth among the elders of the land.

24 She maketh fine linen, and selleth it; and delivereth girdles unto the merchant.

25 Strength and honour are her clothing; and she shall rejoice in time to come.

26 She openeth her mouth with wisdom; and in her tongue is the law of kindness.

27 She looketh well to the ways of her household, and eateth not the bread of idleness.

28 Her children arise up, and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praiseth her.

29 Many daughters have done virtuously, but thou excellest them all.

30 Favour is deceitful, and beauty is vain: but a woman that feareth the Lord, she shall be praised.

31 Give her of the fruit of her hands; and let her own works praise her in the gates - Proverbs 31

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