Indulge me please, dear reader, for I have reached a personal milestone that means a great deal to me and, well, this Substack is personal politics, after all.Saving Culture (from itself) is a reader-supported publication.
Jenny, I've been meaning to say hello, and related too much to this post not to do it. As a remarried mother (boys now young adults) I can appreciate the sparkling wonder of your milestone. Best wishes! May the love keep unfolding in new and happy ways.
Laughter not only heals, but is also the mark of a deep relationship. Those private jokes that lead to shared laughter are truly the lilt of love. Congratulations from someone at 55 years, hoping for more.
Thank you, so beautiful. I especially appreciate your recognition of "alpha" males. I grew up with brothers and boy cousins and spent my career working with veterans, mostly male. I have long felt that the progressive view of men was very very wrong and leading us no where good. Your piece gives this old lady hope.
They are innately powerful, inherently difficult to control and be turned against their values. If your goal is chaos, capitulation and ultimate control over a population, alpha males are an existential threat to you. They must be castrated (literally, if possible.)
The blessing of other people. Not the tension. Not the difficulty. Not the misunderstanding, the mistranslation, the struggle for understanding. Those things are real, of course. But if we've learned anything in the past 3 years, let alone the past 10, it's how important it is that we bond, bless and believe in other people. Congratulations to you and yours. Thanks for sharing this.
Sandy and I call it our lightning bolt anniversary when we first met as single adults. We had known each other as church friends for 10 years, nothing romantic. Then threes years later, 33 years ago. Bam. So happy for you two and keep on writing!
I love the quote that you have an ability to "think things through with a kind of clarity and moral accuracy." In my experience of reading your columns, that has been very much the pattern (and the rare occasions that didn't fit the pattern could normally have been easily solved by more depth of biblical knowledge and understanding). You give evidence of being one of the wisest people around.
Beautiful. I can kinda relate. I was a single mom when I met my partner of the past 12 years now, and even though I had struggled to teach my son to swim and ride a bike, Mike taught him both in less than an hour.
Yeah. Those experiences converted me into seeing how important it is for children to have both the feminine and masculine presence in their lives. I was too nervous and always warning of the harms whereas Mike knew my kid needed to fear less and be less cautious.
Congratulations, cousin! I enjoyed the brief interaction with Brian at your restaurant in Belfast in Feb. 2019 with my son and daughter-in-law. I could sense his wit and humanity. And the appetizers he presented to us were delicious! Ostensibly single since the death of my partner of nine years in 2011 from lung cancer, mine has been a blessed, challenging journey. First there were what I called the crushing lonelies from Karen's death. Then came the loss of my job 11 months later. The reckoning began; who am I without my love and my job? What has unfolded is the realization that I am a glorious, thoughtful man, one who adores his adult children and now granddaughter. I am so grateful to have lived long enough (I will be 66 Dec. 11) to be a grandfather, a presence in this child's life. I am in love with love stories and yours prompted tears of joy that you and Brian found each other, and have cared about each other and yourselves to grow through the pain, not run from it. I sometimes reflect on the Beatles' song, Eleanor Rigby and the hook; "All the lonely people, where do they all come from? All the lonely people where do they all belong?" We belong connected to one another, not through the ANTI-social media (ironic, don't ya think?!), but via deep, meaningful conversation, frivolous pursuits and laughter. Thank you for that poignant reminder. I love you, Jenny! Please tell Brian I am sending him my well wishes. Hug your son.
If you believe in such things, it sounds like you found your soul mate. There's a saying I like. I can't remember who said it. "Nothing in life, worth having, comes easy."
Jenny, I've been meaning to say hello, and related too much to this post not to do it. As a remarried mother (boys now young adults) I can appreciate the sparkling wonder of your milestone. Best wishes! May the love keep unfolding in new and happy ways.
"the sparkling wonder of your milestone" -- what a lovely turn of phrase. Thank you so much.
Laughter not only heals, but is also the mark of a deep relationship. Those private jokes that lead to shared laughter are truly the lilt of love. Congratulations from someone at 55 years, hoping for more.
55 years! Now that is something to be really proud of!
Yes, I am. I had the uncommon good luck to marry the avatar of “fault tolerance.”
Thank you, so beautiful. I especially appreciate your recognition of "alpha" males. I grew up with brothers and boy cousins and spent my career working with veterans, mostly male. I have long felt that the progressive view of men was very very wrong and leading us no where good. Your piece gives this old lady hope.
I'm delighted to be of service. Real men (loaded as that term may be) are perhaps the most misunderstood entity on this earth.
They are innately powerful, inherently difficult to control and be turned against their values. If your goal is chaos, capitulation and ultimate control over a population, alpha males are an existential threat to you. They must be castrated (literally, if possible.)
The blessing of other people. Not the tension. Not the difficulty. Not the misunderstanding, the mistranslation, the struggle for understanding. Those things are real, of course. But if we've learned anything in the past 3 years, let alone the past 10, it's how important it is that we bond, bless and believe in other people. Congratulations to you and yours. Thanks for sharing this.
It's probably the most important, yes. Beautifully said. Thank you.
Sandy and I call it our lightning bolt anniversary when we first met as single adults. We had known each other as church friends for 10 years, nothing romantic. Then threes years later, 33 years ago. Bam. So happy for you two and keep on writing!
How lovely, thank you for that!
Congratulations! And happy anniversary!
Thank you for the well wishes and thanks for reading!
I love the quote that you have an ability to "think things through with a kind of clarity and moral accuracy." In my experience of reading your columns, that has been very much the pattern (and the rare occasions that didn't fit the pattern could normally have been easily solved by more depth of biblical knowledge and understanding). You give evidence of being one of the wisest people around.
Thanks Susan. It's funny, to look back on your own ancient history to find that someone who hurt you immensely also had a lot to teach you.
Lovely story. As a man who was raised by his stepdad, I’m glad you found a good one for your son. Best wishes for a long and happy future.
Thank you very much.
Beautiful. I can kinda relate. I was a single mom when I met my partner of the past 12 years now, and even though I had struggled to teach my son to swim and ride a bike, Mike taught him both in less than an hour.
Isn't that funny? I was flapping around my son, making him nervous and tense, which are not exactly helpful when you need to find balance and flow. 🤣🥰
Yeah. Those experiences converted me into seeing how important it is for children to have both the feminine and masculine presence in their lives. I was too nervous and always warning of the harms whereas Mike knew my kid needed to fear less and be less cautious.
Congratulations, cousin! I enjoyed the brief interaction with Brian at your restaurant in Belfast in Feb. 2019 with my son and daughter-in-law. I could sense his wit and humanity. And the appetizers he presented to us were delicious! Ostensibly single since the death of my partner of nine years in 2011 from lung cancer, mine has been a blessed, challenging journey. First there were what I called the crushing lonelies from Karen's death. Then came the loss of my job 11 months later. The reckoning began; who am I without my love and my job? What has unfolded is the realization that I am a glorious, thoughtful man, one who adores his adult children and now granddaughter. I am so grateful to have lived long enough (I will be 66 Dec. 11) to be a grandfather, a presence in this child's life. I am in love with love stories and yours prompted tears of joy that you and Brian found each other, and have cared about each other and yourselves to grow through the pain, not run from it. I sometimes reflect on the Beatles' song, Eleanor Rigby and the hook; "All the lonely people, where do they all come from? All the lonely people where do they all belong?" We belong connected to one another, not through the ANTI-social media (ironic, don't ya think?!), but via deep, meaningful conversation, frivolous pursuits and laughter. Thank you for that poignant reminder. I love you, Jenny! Please tell Brian I am sending him my well wishes. Hug your son.
Tom Greaney
Blessings and joy to you and Brian!
Congratulations on your first ten years. I hope your happy relationship continues another sixty years or so, at least.
Lovely piece of writing Jenny, there is great truth in your words. Thank you for sharing yourself with us.
I needed this today. Thank you. ❤️
Nothing of value was ever achieved without effort, sacrifice & persistence & this wonderful & inspiring love story shows how it can be done.
Cheers to you & Brian, Jenny. Long may you love.
If you believe in such things, it sounds like you found your soul mate. There's a saying I like. I can't remember who said it. "Nothing in life, worth having, comes easy."